Artificial insemination: options for lesbian couples
Same-sex lovers with a desire to have children: What seems to be a contradiction doesn’t have to be the case these days. In fact, every second lesbian woman would like to live in a family with children. Thanks to modern medical methods, it is now possible for both women to have a child together.
Homosexual couples are not denied the desire to have children
The extent to which homosexual couples can also open the door to having a baby has been discussed in Germany for some time. Studies have been investigating for many years whether children in so-called rainbow families fare differently than in a “classic” household. Researchers often come to the conclusion that children and adolescents differ little or not at all in their development.
Even though marriage has been legal for homosexual couples since autumn 2017, there are still a few hurdles to becoming parents. However, this is by no means a reason to give up the family dream: it is also possible for lesbian couples to start a family through artificial insemination.
Happy children with donor sperm
Sperm donation from a man is the most common way for lesbian couples to open the door to family happiness. The sperm donation can be made available through a sperm bank. In Germany, fertility treatments for homosexual couples are possible in principle, but the law has not been fully clarified even at the time of “marriage for all” – which means that some doctors do not accept lesbian women as patients.
Affected persons should therefore deal thoroughly with their desired fertility clinic and obtain all necessary information during consultations. If a child is born into a rainbow family, in Germany the mother who gave birth to the child is considered the mother. The partner must then adopt the child in order to also be considered a parent. This means that artificial insemination using a sperm donation remains a great opportunity to fulfill the queer desire to have children.
The ROPA method: children of both partners
Nevertheless, this method is becoming increasingly popular among lesbian couples who want to have children because it enables both women to actively participate in the pregnancy. First, one of the women has her eggs removed and artificially inseminated with the help of donor sperm, then they are implanted in her partner, who then carries the child to term. Thus, both women feel equally involved: one partner is the biological mother and the other gives birth to the child.
But even with this option, the child must be adopted by one of the partners in Germany. In this country, this form of fertilization is not possible due to the strict legal situation. Lesbian couples who make their own family a reality using the ROPA method therefore switch to other European countries, such as Spain, where these inseminations are carried out regularly.
The financing of the children’s dream
With the health care reform in 2004, it was decided that health insurance companies would pay a maximum of half of the costs incurred for a maximum of three attempts. In the meantime, however, a rethink has begun in politics. Some health insurance companies now cover the full amount.
In principle, it is also possible to cover the treatment costs abroad, but it is always linked to the legal framework in this country. Couples who opt for the ROPA method, for example, must therefore finance it themselves.
Since autumn 2017, homosexual couples have also been able to marry. If they were previously excluded from the financial grants of the health insurance companies, they now also have the right to financial support. Nevertheless, the financing situation for fertility treatment for lesbian couples in Germany still differs from “normal” fertility treatment. For this reason, a legal check is being carried out to determine whether lesbian couples can also deduct their fertility treatment from tax.
Counseling centers provide help and arrange contacts
The most important contacts are the clinics themselves. The medical specialists can provide answers to all questions relating to the fertilization process. However, independent information centers such as the advice guide for the lesbian and gay association LSVD are also useful addresses that can provide contacts and provide reports on experiences. Here you can also meet like-minded people who can have useful tips.
Talking to other people affected can help to reduce or even eliminate natural doubts and fears that sometimes accompany artificial insemination. Numerous help centers and the strength of the expectant mothers help to fulfill the dream of having a queer child and to let the symbolic rainbow shine.