A fair division of labour is important among parents so that no one feels disadvantaged. But in almost every family, it is a controversial issue who takes over which tasks in the household or who takes care of the child when. Often the partners do not feel recognized in their achievements by the other. We give tips for a balanced division of labour.
The division of labor is not always easy among parents. Even today, it often corresponds to the typical role model of man and woman: the man goes to work and the woman takes care of the child(ren) and household. But is that fair? After all, a day with a lively toddler is at least as exhausting as a working day. So how can you ensure a fair division of labor so that no one is disadvantaged and both partners have time off in the evening if possible?
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ToggleIt is helpful to have a plan for the division of labour, in which the tasks are written down by each parent. The partners should sit down together in peace and consider together what work is required in the household. Who wants to take on which tasks voluntarily, but bindingly? The remaining tasks can then be done alternately by both partners. Is the child an early riser? Then parents should alternate with getting up in the morning.
The division of labor among parents should be organized in such a way that no one feels disadvantaged. It is usually advantageous to settle things in advance, for example at the weekend for the coming week, than to have to find an agreement in a concrete situation. Clear agreements and a little organization make everyday life with children much easier.
In order to maintain the division of labor, firm agreements help, such as: “Who takes care of the child, also eliminates the chaos afterwards” or “If one puts the child to bed, the other makes dinner and tidies up the toys.” Parents should coordinate who can sleep in at the weekend and who has their free evening when – and when both do something together.
Even the best plan for the division of labor will not prevent everyone from having their own ideas – of order, disorder and the tasks at hand. What dad perceives as chaos doesn’t bother mom in the least. Laundry lying around can be the cause of an argument.
Here it is important to talk to each other calmly and to find a solution together that is acceptable to both. So compromises have to be made. Compulsively enforcing one’s will only leads to disappointment and even more strife. In order for everyone to feel understood and treated fairly, it is not only important to have a proper division of labour, but also to clearly express their wishes and needs. Advice for good couple communication is given in the article “10 tips for better communication with your partner“.
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