Child therapist explains: This is how you recognize a good mother
“Am I actually a good mother?”: This is the question most of us ask ourselves every day. Of course we love our children more than anything, but sometimes they just drive us crazy. Keeping your composure is actually anything but easy. So did mom of four, Constance Hall. She then had a conversation with a friend of hers, a child therapist, that would change her life forever.
Constance Hall is a fun-loving young woman from Australia and the mother of four children. On her Facebook page, she reports openly and honestly about her turbulent family life – and no one minces words. In one of her latest articles, she tells of a conversation with a friend of hers, a child therapist, that finally let us mothers breathe a sigh of relief – and should take away the self-imposed pressure of perfection.
Constance reports the therapist looked at her and her children and said, “You are such a good mom!” Taken by surprise, Constance blurted out:
“I don’t feel like a good mother. The kids drive me crazy, I lose my temper and fall asleep wondering where to get the patience for the next day.”
We can identify with this honest answer only too well, right? Being a mother is really exhausting. Each of us knows this from our own experience. In any case, Constance’s girlfriend found the only right words in this case and said something that we will all never forget:
“Babies cry. This is how they communicate with us. Toddlers screech, children whine and teenagers complain. Moms then mutter words like “Damn it!” to themselves before they answer.
But guess what, Con? That’s better than silence.
A household full of screaming children, quarreling teenagers, and parents thrown at every wish and request is a good household to me.
It’s the silent kids, the scared toddlers, the teens who won’t come home, and the parents who don’t communicate with their kids that I worry about.
And kids don’t drive you crazy. It was you before, that’s why you got it in the first place.”
Yelling is exhausting, yes. But it is also proof that children can present themselves as they are – and trust you without limits. And that really is a wonderful thing, isn’t it?
So, dear mom, take a deep breath, straighten your crown and move on. You can be really proud of yourself and your family!
If you want to read more from Constance Hall, check out the articles This Woman Hits the Nail on the Head: This Is What “Parenting Sex” Looks Like , “What Happens When We Push Moms Too Much?” and This mother speaks plain language – and thus all women from the bottom of their hearts.